


First Comes Marriage… Wait, That’s Not Quite Right, But Baby The Only Thing I Need to Be Right Is The Two of Us

by JuHuaTai



Category: One Piece
Genre: (Spoilers: Not really), As in this takes place in Canon Universe but that's it, Attempt at Humor, Excessive Drinking, F/M, Fluff and some Minimal Angst, Gen, M/M, Oneshot, Semi-Canon Compliant, This is like bordering on Crack Fic, Unrequited Love, Wedding Planning, please don't take it seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2020-01-04 04:47:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18336476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuHuaTai/pseuds/JuHuaTai
Summary: Sabo’s getting married out of the blue and Koala has to face that fact that she might have forever lost her chance. The only silver lining in this situation is that she’s not alone in her woes, when someone else seems to have the same hung up on the other groom.





	First Comes Marriage… Wait, That’s Not Quite Right, But Baby The Only Thing I Need to Be Right Is The Two of Us

**Author's Note:**

> I know, okay, i know. I’m sorry it’s not an update, but i’m still swamped irl. I will have something updated by next week, hopefully. Right now though, i’m allowed a bit of break and i suddenly got the idea to write this stupid ass crack fic. This is like written in 2 ours tops so please do not take anything here seriously, i do not know where this come from and tbh it’s probably funnier in my head.
> 
> Also written in Koala’s POV because if i want to write best girl then nothing will stop me dammit.
> 
> Hope you’d enjoy!

 

It all started a shy over 3 months ago, when what was shaping up to be a normal day in the Revolutionary Army’s main base ended with just a few simple words, “I forgot to say, I’m getting married,”

 

It was said with the same nonchalance as a comment about the weather or next plan to destroy the World Government that no one batted an eye for a second until the words themselves dawned within their minds. But as soon as it does register, every single activity inside of the small meeting room was put into a quick halt, be it conversation, reading, paperwork writing and even Ivankov pouring a piping hot tea into Dragon’s cooling cup. The tea now made its way out from the rim of the cup and onto the Revolutionary leader’s pants, not that he seems to notice the steaming hot liquid drenching his thigh.

 

There was complete silence, until there was a giant ear-scratching rip from the very back of the room and everyone turned to see Koala standing there, holding what used to be a thick stack of important documents that was now reduced to nothing else but two stacks of torn papers, each of them squeezed tightly by her gloved hands.

 

Directly opposite of her, near the entrance, Sabo grimaced, “Uh, Koala, aren’t those the vital info we just go—“

 

_“What do you mean you’re getting married?!”_

 

Sabo had looked confused by this outburst, which in Koala’s honest opinion was an expression that has no right to even exist at that very moment. The people around him were the ones who get to be confused. _She’s_ the one who should be the most confused by this, “What do you mean you’re getting married?!” The strawberry blonde nearly shrieked then, clutching the now torn papers in her hand, “W— when?! How?!” she took one shuddering inhale, “ _With who_?!”

 

“Well, i think in a couple of weeks? Give or take 3? I don’t know, he’s the one who decided it,” he shrugged, once again with the air of nonchalance that has no place in that situation, “Oh, and it’s with Ace,”

 

Whatever else Koala was about to say stopped dead in her mouth. As agents alike began to wake up from their stupor and gave Sabo their confused congratulations, the Fishman Karate Instructor still stood shellshocked right where she was.

 

No one who had spent a second with Sabo doesn’t know who Ace and Luffy were in relation to him, both who were already easily recognisable due to their exploits all over New World with their own respective pirate crews. Everyone knows the three of them are close, thick as thieves - with no pun intended, usually Sabo would say, though Koala has no idea where the pun was - three brothers who grew up together under odd circumstances that is a culmination of parental abandonment and familial issues.

 

But that was the thing; they’re brothers, even if not by blood. They always called each other so.

 

So how the hell did being brothers suddenly lead to Sabo marrying one of them?

 

When Koala asked him this later that day, once the shock has finally worn off and she’s able to form words that coincide with her brain, Sabo had only smiled sheepishly, “Well, i know it’s really sudden and i don’t think all of this is necessary, but Ace wanted it and hey, when you love someone, you’ll do anything for them, you know?” he had said with a sheepish smile and a head tilt, the little gesture that made him look so boyish and Koala secretly adored.

 

It made her heart ached a little more.

 

How could it not when you found out the guy you carry a torch for is marrying someone else in a matter of weeks?

 

* * *

 

Why does this happen?

 

Rather, why did _she_ let this happen?

 

“Okay, then it’s settled,” Sabo said, one hand twirling a pen and the other holding on to the paper, “For best men, i’m going to have Hack as mine and you’re going to have Thatch as yours. Luffy will be our ring bearers, and we’ll see into the plan to take Bartolomeo Kuma back from Mariejois and the World Government to officiate us,”

 

Right next to him, Fire Fist Ace sulked behind the large piece of chicken thigh he was chewing on, pouting at the repeatedly scratched out name on the paper, “I still want Luffy to be my best man,”

 

“No, Ace, we both agree not to make him choose between us,” Which is a total lie for how that decision came to be. It was more that the two of them can’t come to agreement as to who gets the youngest on their trio to stand by their side during the wedding. After a near fistfight involving a literal fist of fire and fist imbued with enough _Haki_ to destroy the entire block, Koala had to smack Sabo down and had them compromise with each other, and the only compromise they can reach was to have their brother bring them their rings instead.

 

As the two moved on to discuss other aspects in their upcoming wedding, to Sabo’s left, Koala sat upright, both hands loosely holding a glass of water and couldn’t help but feel like she’s in a surreal dream.

 

The good news is, at least she didn’t think she’s the only one who’s currently suffering. With Ace comes along another one of Whitebeard’s men, who since he had first sat down had not stopped ordering and consuming a good amount of beer and other intoxicating beverages with the most sour and despondent expression in human history. Though for what end, Koala could not fathom; if the rumours and information the Army managed to gather were to be believed, Marco the Phoenix’s Devil Fruit grants him regenerative power, and one of the side effect of said power was that alcohol no longer affected him.

 

“Moby Dick?’

 

“I don’t know if that’s an ideal venue, we have a pretty large guest list. Maybe an island somewhere will be better,”

 

“Baltigo?”

 

“Ace, it’s called a secret base for a reason,”

 

“Ugh, this is hard,” the dark haired male complained, before turning to his fellow Commander, “Marco, where do you think we should get married in?”

 

The eldest on the table simply grunted, mouth permanently attached to the rim of what Koala briefly read to be a vintage rum with 20% more alcohol content than what is safe to consume, and from the see-through container, she can see that he’s down half of it in mere seconds. He finally released the bottle when Ace shook his arm to get his attention, then turned around only to say, “No idea,”

 

Ace rolled his eyes, letting the older man’s arm go and scoffed, “Oh, come on! I bring you here so you can help me! Some help you turn out to be,”

 

Maybe Koala’s imagining it - due to how much it echoed her sentiments - but she’s pretty sure that before Marco continue to latch his mouth on the bottle, he muttered, “Why the fuck would i help? This is bullshit,”

 

A tap to her side pulled the blonde woman’s attention away, “What do you think, Koala?”

 

I think this is indeed bullshit, she wanted to say, but managed to catch herself before the words came out of her mouth, “About the venue? I uh, i don’t know, Sabo,” biting her lower lips, she looked from Sabo to Ace, who was still giving Marco a side-glare, “Actually, i don’t know about this whole wedding. I mean, don’t you think you’re moving way too fast?” Because literally no one knew they were even dating in the first place, then all of the sudden the wedding is happening in 2 weeks because that’s the only time they seems to be able to agree on, and they’re talking about wedding planning and Koala is here in the middle of that despite not wanting to, why did she even come?

 

Oh, right, because Sabo had asked with a smile while saying, “You know that i’ll be lost without you,” and that’s all he needed to do to make her agree.

 

She’s a darn fool.

 

Because she was looking at Sabo, watching how he quirked his lower jaw to the side while glancing away to the other side in that cute little way of his as she spoke, Koala missed the other two in front of her entirely until Ace said, “No, we’re not moving too fast,” he said as his volume began to rise with each word, suspiciously glancing to his side, where Marco was still valiantly trying to drown himself with booze, “Because the sooner we get married, the sooner we’re together forever and _that closes_ _anyone else’s chance to be with me_ , _you know_?!”

 

By the time he finished speaking, Ace had more or less climbed the chair he was sitting on, face only centimetres away from Marco’s ear, who was looking at the other direction. The bottle in his hand was now completely empty, but he was still sucking on the glass rim, teeth scraping against the surface that Koala’s a little worried he might bite through it.

 

Finally, after a long beat, Whitebeard’s First Division Commander placed the bottle down - more like slam it down - on the table and stalked away from the table, mumbling something about ordering more drinks, do you guys want anything, no, okay. All three watched him leave towards the counter, where the lone bartender eagerly awaits him.

 

Ace, still glaring daggers at the man’s retreating form, hissed out, “I swear,” he suddenly then turned and aimed that fiery glare at Sabo, “1 week,”

 

“No,” the blonde next to Koala immediately replied, and it took her a while to realize Ace meant to push their wedding even earlier. What? “Koala and i have somewhere to infiltrate next week, i told you that before,”

 

The dark haired male’s face fell slightly, “Oh come on, it’s not even a big operation, you’re going to some weird bunker in the middle of East Blue of all places. Koala can take care of it herself or bring someone else,”

 

She probably could, but she really didn’t want Sabo to accomodate his personal life above the Revolutionary’s goals and importance. At least, that’s what she told herself, when in reality, Koala just didn’t want for this sudden wedding to happen any faster than it should be.

 

Still, she knows how much Sabo loved his brothers - especially this one, apparently - so it was with great shock when she heard Sabo made an unamused sound from his throat before saying, “Ace, don’t be selfish. I’m not going to leave Koala to do an infiltration by herself, and besides, it’s my duty. I’ll go along with all of your plans, but Koala and the Revolutionary Army are important to me and i’m not going to put them aside,”

 

It’s unfair that Sabo can say that. It’s unfair how his words can make her heart flutters, despite knowing that he’s saying it to his future groom and husband. No, maybe even especially since he’s saying it to him.

 

Koala expected Ace to be mad about that, but he only grumbled a little, “Fine,” he drawled, glancing at her and throwing her a little grin, “You see how sappy he gets around you? I’m kind of jealous,”

 

And the award for the greatest irony in the world goes to this conversation right here, Koala thought bitterly as she forced a smile.

 

* * *

 

“So how long has this been going on?”

 

Oh god, she didn’t really want to know. Why did she even ask that? There’s a glimmer of fondness on Sabo’s eyes when he looked away from his dresser, and the smile that rose on his lips when he chose one of his dress shirts made Koala’s chest tight, “He’s been asking since half a year ago, actually. I kept telling him it’s a bad idea, but he kept insisting in the end, i guess i just gave up. Still, he was so happy when i finally agree so i guess it’s fine,”

 

Despite how nonchalant he sounded about the whole affair, his expression said otherwise. That’s a look Koala know is always reserved only for his brothers, and if she had been a tad bit jealous of it once upon a time, the painful clench in her stomach right now is on another level entirely, “You really love him, huh?”

 

The Chief of Staff barked a laugh, “Trust me, Ace’s lucky i do or else i would’ve drown him in the nearest body of water with how persistent he is,” the dress shirt is lifted on eye level, the front facing Koala from where she sat on Sabo’s bed, “How’s this one? It doesn’t have as much tear and damage as the others. Think i should go with my usual suit?”

 

Koala actually remembered this one to be Sabo’s favorite, hence why it’s not as worn or damaged as his other outfits. He only wore this one on special occasions, rarely on missions when they can get damaged but for those infiltrations where they have to blend in with the upper class or just when he wanted to have a nice night out with some of the Revolutionary members and want to dress up a little.

 

It’s also a shirt Koala gave him on his 18th birthday. He had hugged her after opening it, saying that ‘he’ll forever treasure it’.

 

She loved it every time he wore that shirt.

 

Now it took all of her will to tamper down that unnecessary feeling of betrayal down with a less than audible swallow as she gave a wan smile, “Yeah, looks great for the wedding,”

 

* * *

 

Having lived with the same people since she was a young girl, Koala knew that they know her just as deeply as she knows them. Exempting Sabo of course, because right now, there doesn’t seem to be anything in his mind but his upcoming nuptial and probably love for his new groom.

 

But not everyone is as distracted, which is why after she had flipped one too many new recruit way too hard, Hack called out for an early class dismissal before coming up to her and said in a low voice, “I know you’re not in the best of mood right now, but please don’t take it out on the recruits,”

 

“ _I’m fine,_ ” the blonde hissed out, far too violently that the recruit who wobbled away let out a scared squeak. She throws him an apologetic glance before turning back to Hack, who had his arms crossed right now, “I’m fine, Hack,”

 

The fishman was quiet, and she noticed that it wasn’t until the last of the recruits finally left the room that he spoke, “It’s okay to say you’re not,” his gruff voice was gentle, and Koala hated it more than she appreciated it. She’s fine, she’ll get over it. She’s not some bimbo who will get hung up on a guy she has a crush on since puberty and realized she’s in love with after the feeling doesn’t go away nearly 10 years and so many embarrassing years navigating through said puberty with.

 

“It’s okay to say you’re not,” Hack repeated again, this time offering her a handkerchief, and she appreciate and hate him so much in that moment when the sight of the plain cloth made her very, very aware that her sight is starting to blur and her cheeks felt suspiciously wet.

 

“They’re picking out flowers today,” she sniffed, voice barely above a whisper because years had told her that the walls on this floor isn’t the thickest and who knows if anyone is still outside, “Fucking flowers, Hack. Sabo doesn’t even like them. Remember how he would sneer at Iva-chan’s floral decoration on our new year party? He pinched those flower crown Iva-chan made like they’re contaminated and set them on fire with the nearest candle the second no one’s looking,”

 

The fishman nodded, or at least, Koala thought he did. She couldn’t really see when she’s burying her face into the handkerchief, trying to stifle her damned unstoppable tears, “You cover for him while running away when Ivankov found out what he did. That was brave of you, by the way,”

 

“Of course i will, he’s my best friends and i,” the words were on the tip of her tongue, heavy like lead and bitter like nothing else she had ever tasted, “I… for him, i….,”

 

She couldn’t say it, not anymore.

 

He’s not hers to begin with, and now, he’s never going to be hers.

 

* * *

 

Because the world is fucked up, of course that despite repeatedly washing her face and even compressing them with ice, her eyes remained puffy until next breakfast, and of course that was also the moment Koala realized that Sabo brought Ace back, here, into their secret hideout.

 

Ace, who was wearing Sabo’s shirt and pyjama pants, sitting right next to the blonde, a stack of plate right in front of them.

 

Her hands clenched so tightly on her breakfast tray that it took someone’s startled yelp to realized she had broken the wood into two and her soup was tethering precariously on one side while her pudding and toast has already fallen to the ground.

 

They were still talking furiously between themselves when she approach them - with a new tray of breakfast, given by a sympathetic and slightly scared kitchen hand - and though a mouthful, she thought she heard Ace say, “—saw how he was yesterday! He’ll have to say something, right?”

 

Koala’s stomach sunk at the reminder, that she almost missed Sabo’s exasperated sigh and equally exasperated reply, “I told you, didn’t i? This is dumb, you’re dumb,”

 

Ace pouted, “ _You’re_ dumb,”

 

“No you,”

 

The exchange escalated from little pokes to outright pushing each other, and violent as it was, one could tell that it was all well in between them from the large smiles and laughters. As Ace thrust his hand out to push Sabo again, the blonde ducked, pulling Ace by said outstretched arm and pull him into a very, very tight - and borderline inappropriate, considering where they are - embrace. Koala saw his lips moving, still smiling right above Ace’s ears, and Ace’s grin turned gentle, more reserved, as he laid his head on Sabo’s shoulder, burying his face into the thin fabric of his shirt.

 

At least this time around, she heard the telltale crack on her tray before it completely broke in half.

 

* * *

 

In the middle of Moby Dick’s deck, someone had started a round of drinking competition, and Koala is so, so, very tempted to join in if she didn’t think being intoxicated would do much, much worse thing to her already crumbling self-control.

 

Time has reached midnight, and in a couple of hours, they will arrive and Sabo and Ace are to be wed in a small island under Whitebeard’s territory. Just days before, Edward Newgate, on behalf of his ‘son’, had extended an invitation for the Revolutionary army to board his ship and held a bachelor party for both grooms. Dragon had agreed, despite having some reservations, and he’s now sitting by the captain’s massive chair, both drinking from sake cups that’s suitable for Whitebeard and Whitebeard alone. All around them, Whitebeard Pirates, Revolutionary army and even the Strawhat Pirates were running around, making merry for the joyous occasion to come.

 

Koala felt like vomiting.

 

And evidently, that shows outwardly as well, because she briefly caught Nami flinching at the sight of her as the orange haired girl approached, “Koala, are you okay?” In her hands were two slim bottle of whatever alcoholic drink was served, the fruity smell pleasant and sweet and adding up to the desire to just spew her entire stomach content right where she stood. It didn’t help that by turning to Nami, Koala was forced to see the sight behind her, of Sabo tussling with his brothers over whatever game it is they’re playing as part of tonight’s ‘Bachelor party’.

 

Sabo, who’s now grinning so dazzlingly at Ace - and Luffy - laughing so carefree and looking like he’s having a time of his life clinging so closely there’s barely any air between them.

 

“I’m good, thanks,” the blonde curtly replied, not that her answer chased away the concerned frown on the Strawhat’s Navigator’s face. She took the offered bottle and took a small sip, the bubbling sweetness doing nothing at all to calm down her flaring nerves.

 

“If you say so,” Nami spoke again, hazel eyes scanning her from top to bottom, “Listen, they’re going to play some new game after this and we need more people. What do you say? You can team up with me, Robin and Izou. We’ll wreck the boys team and leave them to eat dust,” she gave her a playful wink, one hand nudging her towards the crowd that gathered around the groom-to-bes.

 

Koala pulled away as gently as she could, looking down at the bottle of drink in her hand before she could see the way Nami’s face fell, “I’m good,” the pink clad girl muttered, “Thanks,”

 

She finally decided to look up when the other girl leaves, steps hesitant and with a final, “If you change your mind, join us anytime, okay?” hanging in the air. From under the rim of her hat, Koala watched as Nami walked away, and when she made the same mistake of glancing to the party again, she felt her heart skipping a beat.

 

Sabo was now looking at her, still grinning as he was before. He’s waving his hand just as enthusiastically as he was calling out for her, and without realizing it, Koala returned the smile with a small, weak wave of her own, dazed and hypnotized by the sight of him.

 

At least, she was, until Ace entered the picture, tugging on Sabo’s sleeve and entirely stealing all of the blond man’s attention away from her.

 

Her smile dropped harder and faster than her stomach. To chase away the unpleasant jab within her organ, Koala lifted the bottle in her hand and began chugging down the content, hoping that the alcohol will numb her.

 

Even to the last drop, she was still entirely too aware, too awake, too hurt.

 

A whistle next to her caught her attention, and the strawberry blonde Revolutionary Officer turned to see a fishman - Namur, Whitebeard Pirates’s 8th Division Commander - and a tall Cyborg - Franky, Strawhat Pirate’s shipwright - staring at her as if she grew multiple heads, “Damn, girlie. That was impressive,” the blue haired Cyborg whistled again, grinning, “Hey, we’re starting a drinking game after this for the grooms, what say you join our— Hey, where are you going?”

 

Koala knows it was rude of her, but she didn’t even let him finish as she stalked away, hand clutching the glass bottle in her and so tight she could feel it began to crack under the pressure. Through the cacophony around her, she could hear Franky muttering, "Did i say something wrong?” to Namur’s equally confused answer.

 

She needs to leave. She wants to be far away from all of these revelries, somewhere far from the sight of Sabo being happy with his soon to be spouse, somewhere she could lick her wound in peace, where she could finally let the tears that she’s been holding back painfully out—

 

And she need to start watching where she’s going when she suddenly ran into someone, causing her to stumble backward. An apology was on the tip of Koala’s tongue as she rubbed her aching nose, when the person she collided to beat her to the punch, “Sorry, didn’t see you there,”

 

“No, it’s my… oh,”

 

Any other word faltered in the blonde’s lips when she finally saw who it is she’s talking to, and more importantly, the state the man’s in. Everywhere she looked since the beginning of the night, there had only been happy, smiling faces full of celebration, of laughter and happy hollers, of people mingling together no matter your faction or affiliation, because tonight was all about being happy and celebrating an impending union. Koala thought she had been alone in her misery.

 

But if anything, Marco the Phoenix looked even more terrible than she was, his glazed eyes made it clear that he is far from being sober and the redness on his cheeks just adds to the miserable air he’s practically exuding. In his arm was a small crate, filled with bottles clinking against each other, one that made even more noise when he jostled it around to get a better hold. Bottles of drink Koala, who’s impartial about alcohol in general, could still recognize as stuff way, way stronger than the ones served in this party, way stronger, the kind of strong drinks people with serious problems turn to for their problems, “If you’ll excuse me, i need to be somewhere else,”

 

“Where are you going?” The younger blonde asked before she could stop herself, eyes still trained on the various bottles inside of Marco’s crate.

 

Marco gave her an impatient look, “Somewhere far away from here,” he groused, glancing somewhere behind her. She followed his line of sight to predictably see the centre of the party, the two men of the night, surrounded by people partying.

 

She saw them, saw Sabo… and Ace.

 

Oh.

 

When she glanced back to the pirate, she noticed that he no longer pays her any attention. Instead, his faded blue eyes were fixed right to the party, the hard annoyance that was focused on her earlier melting into something she recognize all to well; bitterness, jealousy, anger, and just pure heartbreak.

 

Marco began to turn around again when Koala, not knowing just what it is that possessed her to do so, shot her hand out to grab one of the bottles in his crate. It was heavy, with intricate design on them, one she also briefly recall to be the same brand he had been drinking when she saw him weeks ago, “Hey!”

 

“Share with me,” she demanded, holding the bottle tight in case he decided to fight her for it back. And oh, she will fight, _Yonko_ Commander or not. Maybe a fight will be a better alternative, if it’s so it can distract her from everything right now.

 

The older man frown in displeasure, “What, no. This is my personal collection, and i need all of them right now,”

 

“Share with me,” Koala insisted, dodging away from Marco when he predictably tries to grab the bottle away from her. It’s a fairly easy feat, especially when he’s already wobbling, “I need it too,”

 

“For what? There’s plenty left for the party, just go…” he faltered all of the sudden, and Koala had a suspicion she knows why. It’s kind of easy to guess why, actually, when the anger in Marco’s face faded into what looked like pity, easily recognisable through the blurriness of the tears that has started to spill out from her eyes.

 

She watched as he glanced beyond her, towards the centre of the merriment, and as understanding seems to dawn on him with a simple and soft, “Oh,”

 

In the end, Marco gave a small sigh and began to retract his hand back. With one last glance to her and the bottle she’s clutching now like a favorite, comforting teddy bear, he jerked his head to the side, “I know some place quiet, no far from here. Hope you’re still sober enough for some climbing,”

 

* * *

 

’Some place quiet’ turns out to be the furthest away crows nest on Moby Dick, far enough that the sound of people partying were distant like a bad memory.

 

The vintage rum tasted like pure torture sliding down her throat, making Koala coughed like there’s no tomorrow, so much that Marco had to take the bottle away from her before she spilled it through her convulsing. Still, once she calmed down enough, she snatched it back, and Marco had allowed it without much of a fight. She drank more carefully, feeling the burn once again in her throat and stomach, but this time, she anticipated it.

 

“I’ve seen you chug this thing down like it’s nothing,” the younger blond complained, voice hoarse from the sting, “How’d you do it?”

 

Marco snorted in amusement, and as if on cue, began to drink from the bottle in his hand with such ease as if it was water. The smell that permeated from it tells her it was most definitely not something so harmless, “Age,” he began, a bitter sneer on his lips, “Habit, hobby. A lifetime of unresolved regrets,”

 

At the mention of regret, Koala leaned back against the pole behind her, curling into herself. She took a careful sip, “How easy is it to move on from that?”

 

The bottle making its way to Marco’s lips paused mid way. He glanced at her, considering, and with a sardonic smile, gestured to the crate between them, “If you’re looking for a way to numb yourself it felt like it hardly mattered, i’m your guy. If you’re looking for a way to move on, i suggest asking someone else,” he chuckled, a sound so bitter it soured the inside of Koala’s mouth. With a sigh, Marco took a careful sip, “I thought i’m already too old to keep piling up on regrets, but i guess not,”

 

When he drank again, she mimicked him, down to the length of drink time and the way he took the burn with such ease. She gave up not even 5 second later, coughing, “How’d i do for my first big regret in life?” Koala finally asked when she calmed down enough, wiping her spit on the back of her gloves and already feeling lightheaded and winded.

 

With a more playful smile, Marco scoffed, “Choking on a vintage rum while drinking alone an old man is how you deal with your first big regret? You need to step up your game, kid. At your age, that’s pathetic,”

 

It was stupid, but she still laughed, “Yeah? And what do you think i should’ve done so i’m doing something more ‘my age’?”

 

Marco actually looked like he’s giving her silly question an actual thought, “Kids your age are energetic and prone to do wild things. You need to do just that. Starts crashing the party downstairs, finds someone or a couple of people for the night and start your own party, tear things up and start up a fight, stuff you’ll regret even more than they’ll just automatically cancels each other,” he snickers with every answer, obviously drunk, but there was a moment of sober clarity when his smile died down, and he spoke in almost a whisper, “Actually go up to the groom and tell him your feeling the day before his wedding, because that’s what you should’ve done in the first place. And now you can’t anymore,”

 

Silence descended between them, only interrupted when Koala lifted her bottle and took a daring glug, ignoring the burn that reached up to her brain. In that woozy state that marks the start of the alcohol entering her blood flow, she asked, “What about objecting and confessing during the wedding itself? Sounds more wild to me,”

 

“Hey, that’s not bad,” Marco told her honestly, smiling stupidly proud by her words. Koala herself felt stupidly proud at the compliment, “See? You can think of something,”

 

Koala laughs. She laughs and laughs and laughs like a mad woman, until tears of hilarity drops from her eyes, until her head started spinning and it wasn’t until she saw Marco moving closer and patted the top of her head comfortingly that she realized her laughter had turned into sobbing and the tears of laughter only drips sorrow, “I love him,” she cried on the older blond’s shoulder, clutching his shirt tight like a lifeline, “I’m so in love with him. I hate this wedding, I hate it so much,”

 

“I know,” was whispered from the top of her head soothingly, “I know. Let it all out, kid,”

 

The night continues on, and at some point, the revelry behind them died down to nothing. Koala never really notice when that happened, not that she even cared about it in the first place.

 

All she knew, is that she spent that night crying on the shoulder of a man twice her age, half drunk bottle held limply by one hand, as she continues to cry until her eyes and head hurts, wishing things had gone differently.

 

Yet no matter how much she cried, the next morning still cries, and so does the dreaded wedding.

 

* * *

 

Objectively speaking, the wedding was incredibly beautiful.

 

Held in the shore of the island, the platform that serves as the altar was decorated with an amalgamation of all sorts of red and blue flowers, each formed like twines over the arch that led towards the altar. The large number of guest filled the entirety of the beach, split into two groups to surround a single carpeted line decorated by more flowers. Bartolomeo Kuma, newly rescued from the clutches of the World Nobles and unflappable by this sudden assignment, stood rigidly right in front of Sabo, who was dressed in his usual suit, with his hair slicked back formally underneath the hat he took off as he reached his spot next to the giant priest.

 

He looked nervous, glancing around the crowd twice in the minute he stood there, before he met Koala’s eyes and smiled.

 

From where she stood by Dragon’s side, Koala, hungover, all cried out and numb, couldn’t even return the gesture.

 

She felt guilt encroaching her chest when Sabo’s smile slipped away into nothing. For a moment there, she thought he looked concerned, and she was about to remedy the situation by mustering a smile against her actual emotion when a fanfare started from the back of the crowd and Sabo’s attention was back to the source of the noises. Instantly, what little smile that was on Koala’s face dropped.

 

That felt like an allegory of how it’s going to be from now on, she thought as she, along with everyone else stood up, eyes still fixed on the blond groom. Sabo’s attention will never be fixed on her like it was before, forever distracted by the love of his life. She watched a smile grew on his face, gentle and loving, and wondered to herself how long it’s going to take for the jealous fire in the pit of her stomach to calm down.

 

From the very end of the carpet, seen first by his massive bulk, Whitebeard walked tall and proud from between the crowd. The closer he got, Koala could see little Chopper coming into sight, sitting right on top of Ace’s pet cat Kotatsu while he toss around flower petals, each of them forming a track for the other groom’s party as they make their way to their destination by the end of the path. Luffy followed suit right behind the two, trying his best to do a formal walk while holding a little pillow with two rings on it, which he put so much concentration on not dropping that his eyes bugged out at how hard he’s staring at them.

 

Whitebeard, Red Haired Shanks and surprisingly Garp the Fist were seen next, forming a formidable wall of powerful men that concealed the audience from the groom and glaring at each other. Supposedly, Whitebeard was the only appointed ‘father of the groom’ for the event to walk Ace down the altar, yet Red Haired Shanks had intruded in the middle of last night’s party - which explains why she didn’t see him at all - claiming that he knew Ace longer than Whitebeard did and thus should’ve fulfilled the father role better with him being his little brother’s saviour and all. Garp the Fist arrived hours before the wedding, complete with an entire marine fleet, demanding that as grandfather, he has the right to not only attend but to walk his grandson down the altar and not to worry, these marines are sworn to secrecy but if he’s denied his right, he will have them contacting the nearest marine base.

 

If people had been expecting a blowout between the Marines and Revolutionary Army, then they’d both be disappointed and had their wish come true in the form of Garp and Dragon clashing in the forest for an hour straight, before emerging and commanding temporary truce to their respected soldiers. As if to remind everyone of that fight, one could see the massive bruise on the side of Garp’s face, made even more noticeable when he sneered at the none too subtle jab from Shank’s elbow. There wasn’t a visible mark on Dragon, but Koala caught the small limp on her leader’s step when he first walked in with Sabo.

 

After the three men passed, there he was. The second groom. The man Koala could only ever dub in her mind as the one who stole the love of her life from under her nose and she could do nothing about.

 

With a handful of bouquet of the same flowers she had seen decorating every inch of this port, Ace walked in with the sort of grace one wouldn’t have expected from him over the red carpet, his ever present orange hat nowhere in sight, and being the only thing missing from his usual ensemble. As he walked pass, those Koala recognize to be members of the Whitebeard pirates would either coo or openly hoot, filling in the merriment on this otherwise formal ceremony.

 

As he passed by where Koala sat, she clutched her hands tightly, her chest constricting something painful, and not just for the sight of him.

 

Unlike Sabo’s beaming happiness, there’s an unconcealed frown on Ace’s face, one that shouldn’t be present in the face of a groom on the day of his wedding. His eyes were darting wildly between the guests, not once looking at the altar where his soon-to-be-husband stood, and the closer he got to the altar, the deeper his frown becomes that it turns into what Koala thought seems akin to despair. Even as e took the step up to stand by Sabo’s side, Ace’s eyes were still watching the crowd, now visibly distressed, and it took Sabo trying to get his attention twice for him to finally pay attention to Kuma when the ex-Shicibukai began his opening speech.

 

Koala frowned, the jealousy and bitterness in the pit of her stomach shuffling to make way for confusion and curiousity. What’s going on? Who is he looking for?

 

As Kuma drones on and on about the importance of union and how the law and government doesn’t define what is legal for pirates, Koala’s attention was fully stolen by Ace’s nervous fidgeting. This didn’t seem to escape Sabo’s attention, who whispered something at him, the movement so subtle that Koala’s sure she only caught it because of how close she sat near them. Whatever it is Sabo was saying doesn’t seem to calm Ace down, who began to whisper something fervently back. He looked even more distressed and soon, so does Sabo.

 

A line of thought entered Koala’s mind, one that made her stomach clench for a different reason than the dull pain that it has caused the whole day; Was Ace having second thoughts?

 

The fire inside of her seems to flare again, and this time it came back with vengeance, filled with indignant anger. How dare he. He had beside him the most wonderful man in the world, who would do anything for those he loved, a kind man who deserves the world and would never stop to do the same to those who matters to him. One Koala would give the world to, but he beat her to the punch, and now, he dared doubting Sabo in the most important day of their lives?

 

And yet as her anger began to flare, so does a hint of pity and surprisingly, it was directed to Ace. He looked near tears as Kuma was near the end of his speech, and while one could mistake that as happy tears, she was surprised to recognize it the way she quickly understand what was underneath Marco’s drunken expression the night before. It was one of heartbreak. It looked solemn and defeated.

 

(Ace looked like he had his hopes crushed, and it was clear by the pitiful sob that left him and reached Koala’s ears)

 

With an audible thud, Kuma closed and finally looked up from the holy book in his hand, “Now then, before we begin this ceremony, if there’s anyone at all in attendance who has cause to believe that this couple should bot be joined in marriage, please speak up now or forever hold your peace,”

 

Forever hold your peace.

 

Would she ever be able to forever hold her peace? The moment they left this place, Sabo is no longer available within her reach. She watched as the blond man held his silently weeping groom’s hands comfortingly, probably trying to dissuade whatever doubt it is that’s inside Ace’s mind, and remembered when it was her hands in his, hearing him muttering words of encouragement to her during those moments she thought things were too much.

 

In a very brief moment, she also thought about Marco, about the bitter smile on his lips when he started speaking of lifelong regret. She ad noticed his absence from the Whitebeard Pirates Commander row, and wondered if after he brought her to her room last night, barely able to stand up on her own, he had gone back to that crows nest and drink on his own again. She wondered if he’s not there that morning because he was still up there, drowning himself in liquor to no end.

 

She remembered her own words to him.

 

Perhaps last night’s alcohol was still coursing strongly through her veins, because before she realized it, Koala had stood up, her hands clutched on the front of her skirt and feeling more determined than she ever been in her life. She could feel all eyes on her, could hear Dragon’s confused call of her name, couldn’t be deterred even as Sabo paused mid-whisper to Ace and ignored him in favour of looking at her. She watched the surprise and astonishment in his face, and felt her resolve steeling.

 

With a shaky breath, Koala opened her mouth.

 

“I OBJECT!”

 

And immediately, blonde woman froze.

 

That shout did not come from her.

 

A burst of blue reaped shocked shouts from all corners of the beach the moment it landed just a few feet away from the altar. Blue wisp of fire faded into the form of a man, panting hard with the same flushed cheeks she saw from last night, yet with sharp eyes that buries any evidence of drunkenness and filled with only single-minded determination, “I object!” Marco repeated, fist balled and teeth gritted, “I object this union!”

 

“Marco, what the hell?! What are you doing?” and other variation of shouted questions asking about the commander’s sanity could be heard from Whitebeard Pirate’s section, and yet it’s very noticeable how their own captain was silent, clearly looking as if he had been expecting this outcome.

 

“I’m tired of regrets. I’m tired of only wondering and wondering and always letting everything that matters to me slip by my hands,” completely ignoring his crewmates, Marco the Phoenix took a step closer to the altar, his eyes entirely focused on Ace, “And i want you. Ace, i’m in love with you,”

 

If the Whitebeard Pirates’ exclamation had been loud, then the noise after this declaration was _deafening._

 

Confusion, outrage, even excitement for the impending drama filled the scene as far as eyes could see. Koala, despite what she herself was trying to do before, was filled with surprise, and there was a part of her that felt happy for Marco. Maybe despite all he said, he’s not too old for something wild, after all.

 

She turns to where the grooms were, noting the even more shocked look on Sabo’s face. He doesn’t even look a bit upset, just entirely caught of guard, glancing between Marco and Ace, blinking repeatedly.

 

As for Ace…

 

It was only for a split second, but Koala could’ve sworn that he was _smiling._

 

Of course, she couldn’t entirely be too sure when he frowned, clutching the bouquet in his hand tightly, “Now? Now you said you love me?” the raven haired groom hissed, instantly quieting down the rest of the voices around, “How could you? On my wedding day, the happiest day of my life and only now you could say that to me?”

 

Marco looked crushed, but he kept going on, “I was an idiot, alright?! I was worried for a lot of things, our age difference, our station, our future, i wasted too much time worrying that didn’t even register to me that i might lose you!”

 

“Well maybe now is too late, Marco! I’m already marrying—“

 

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Ace, he already said he loved you! You got what you wanted, can we please stop this whole charade now?!”

 

And then, there was only silence. So much that, it wouldn’t even surprise Koala if everyone in attendance pretty much held their breath the same way she does.

 

With pursed lips, Ace slowly turned to Sabo, grimacing, “Saaaab’,” he whined, “You ruined it,”

 

Sabo raised both of his hands, rolling his eyes in exasperation, “Ace, he already said he loves you,” the blond emphasised every word, gesturing between Ace and the bewildered Marco, “Which is the entire point of us setting up this whole wedding sham. What else do you want?”

 

“Well, he hasn’t begged me to change my mind or fight you for me yet, i told you, that’s important,”

 

“And i told you already i don’t want to fight him! Why is that the one thing you kept insisting about?!”

 

“Oh come on, it’s going to be romantic and after all i went through to set this up, i deserve some fighting for my affection!”

 

“You mean _we_ went through to set up this whole thing, and why does he have to fight me?!”

 

Whatever Ace’s reply was was cut short by Marco’s low, dangerous voice, “Are you telling me,” the zoan started, glaring at the two bickering people on the altar, “You set up a fucking fake wedding to make me jealous?!”

 

If Ace felt bad for this deception, he sure doesn’t show it, “Well, what else am i supposed to do until you’d take a hint and confess to me?! I’ve spent two years trying to make it clear i like you, but you brush me off every single time! I even stripteased in front of you and you thought i was feeling hot! Tell me, what else am i supposed to do to get your attention?!”

 

“Not this!”

 

“Well it worked, didn’t it?!”

 

Marco glared, raised a finger in warning, and stayed silent, mouth moving without a word falling off of it. In the end, he gave a high pitched yell that sounded close to the angry screech of an angry bird, but that seems to be his only counter-argument. At Ace’s smug look, however, he seems to finally found his voice again, “You are entirely unbelievable! This is stupid, even for you, what the hell were you thinking?!”

 

“I’m thinking that you’re a stupid, stubborn old man who needs to have word dragged out of you!”

 

“Oh, i’m stubborn and stupid? Okay, maybe i take it back, maybe you two can just marry each other for all i care!”

 

“You don’t get to take it back, stupid, you already said you’re in love with me and i’m not letting you take it back! You’re mine now because i’m in love with you too!”

 

“That’s now how things work!” the aggression behind Marco’s words was severely tampered down by the blooming flush on is face, one that clearly has nothing to do with alcohol. Despite herself, Koala found herself letting out a small ‘aww’ at the sight of how flustered the first division commander look by just those simple words.

 

As the shouting match continues, the rest of the guest watched on, perplexed by this turn of outcome. Somewhere from the front seat, Luffy turned to Zoro, asking out loud, “So, there’s no wedding? Oh man, i was looking forward to the reception party,”

 

The same question began to pop up from different areas in the sea the guests, littered with confused voices asking what just happened in the last 5 minutes. It was all shushed down again when Ace suddenly shouted, “No, the wedding is still on,” he declared, grabbing Marco’s hand. The bouquet he had been holding on to was now held between their joined hands, ruffled and no longer in the same pristine condition, but could still serve its purpose, “But this time, it’s between you and me,”

 

Sabo, who has been quiet the entire time spectating their argument, glanced between them two of them, “Ooh, uh, you literally just got together… i think. Don’t you think you two are kinda rushing it into thi—“

 

“No we’re not. Marco, will you marry me?”

 

“I’m very tempted to say no after being fooled like this and knowing the actual extent of your dumbassery,” he shot out is other hand, grabbing on to Ace’s other free and and held it tightly, as if afraid to let go, “But fuck it. Yes, i will marry you,”

 

“Good. Kuma, marry us,”

 

To his credit, the massive man didn’t seem perturbed by this flurry of event. Or maybe he is, but it’s always hard to tell with him, “Let us continue to the ceremony then. Do you, Marco the Phoenix, take Portgas D. Ace to be your unlawfully wedded—“

 

“Yes, god knows why. In sickness, health, for better and for worse and from one idiotic, impulsive idea to the next from now on and through the astronomical fallout, forever and ever, i do,”

 

“Again, if it worked, it’s not stupid, you’re just angry you got fooled—“

 

“Portgas D. Ace, do you take—“

 

‘Yes, i do, forever and ever even when he’s even more old and wrinkly while i’m going to stay young and beautiful because unlike me, he likes to waste so much time, and not even his death by too much self-inflicted stress will do us apart,”

 

“Yes, because i’ll still stress myself out in death because of you and make sure to haunt you to let you know—“

 

‘By the power not vested in me by the World Government or any legal constituents, i pronounced you married, you may stop bickering and kiss your groom,”

 

And they did.

 

It was rather hard to tell who kissed who first, and to be honest, the first few seconds of their lips connecting, it was so aggressive and angry Koala actually felt scared for the two of them and thought that this was probably a bad idea. Yet as moments passed, the kiss turned slower, gentler, it turned to display a fervent passion that made her blush just looking at them and was tempted to look away to give them some privacy.

 

Though in the end, she was glad that she didn’t because that would mean missing the second it finally dawned on them what just happened. She could tell it happened the moment Ace smiled and laughed to the kiss, and when Marco’s arms circled his new husband’s waist, pulling him so suffocatingly close. They separated with identical smiles on their lips, eyes watery, and as they dove for a second, gentler and loving kiss, Koala found herself clapping, her own eyes wet like so many others around her.

 

Something white passed by her sight, and she followed it to see Sabo next to her, offering a handkerchief to her with a smile. That smile, now once again only focused on her.

 

She smiled as she took it with a whispered thank you, and when she felt his arms around her shoulder, pulling her against his side, she went without a fight.

 

Koala blew into the handkerchief, and muttered, “I love weddings,”

 

* * *

 

“Wait, what do you mean i didn’t mention it was all fake?”

 

Koala gave Sabo the most withering look she could muster, which seems to be enough for him to realize his own errors, “Oops,” he squeaked, rubbing the back of his head and laughing guiltily, “Uh, well, i was wondering why everyone was so genuine and kept congratulating me, i thought you were all nice enough to make it look genuine,”

 

As soon as the wedding procession was done, all of the guest moved on to the reception area, where last night’s party seems to resume. Garp and Dragon’s fight had left a big crater in the middle of the forest, big enough for all of the guest to stick around and mingle and thus, instead of going back to Moby, that’s where they decided to held the reception in. Sabo had gone back to the port where the procession took place to pick up some of the decoration flowers, which he and said he wanted to toss on the newlyweds and Koala came along to help.

 

Help, as in he needed her to pick up the flowers while he collect whatever else he could find around the beach for this surprise of his.

 

Koala picked up a rather large rose, one that decorated the arrangement by the altar when she caught sight of Sabo’s hand on the corner of her eyes, picking up one of the aster next to it. He picked it up and, despite so many times making it clear he disliked any sort of flowers, started fiddling with the long stemmed aster, “You know, i uh, i know this whole thing was fake, but i actually had a lot of fun planning it. Well, as much fun as i can have when you’re making a decision with Ace, anyway. You have no idea how often he changed his mind and how persistent he is at doing outrageous things,”

 

The blue clad man rounded the long stem into a small circular shape, clumsily tying them up, “Agh, i used to be able to do this, give me a sec,” he muttered, before glancing up to Koala with a grin, “Point is, i found out i’m actually kind of useless when it comes to wedding planning and i’ve learned my lesson. For my own wedding, i’m so not choosing anything, i’ll let my future wife decided on things and i’ll just help however i can,”

 

At the mention of ‘future wife’ Koala’s amused smile slipped away, the old pang in her chest returning. Oh no.

 

Oblivious to her sudden despair, Sabo painstakingly tied up the small end of the now circular stem, keeping it into the intended shape. The flower stem now took the shape of a ring, while he began to pinch on the aster petals to keep them upright, “Oh, woo, i still got it. A bit wonky, but i got it,”

 

“Sabo, listen” Koala began, feeling her chest stammer as he turned to her, still smiling over his accomplishment for making a flower ring, “I… to be honest, i…,”

 

But she didn’t have time to complete her words when Sabo suddenly offered the ring to her, holding the bottom of the ‘ring’ between his thumb and pointer, “So i hope you won’t mind when it’s our time. Just tell me what to do, okay? You know i’ll be completely lost without you,"

 

Koala could only stare at the flower ring, mouth frozen half open, eyes wide.

 

In the silence that ensues, Sabo’s smile began to slip, “Uh, too forward? I, uh, well, i feel a bit dumb. I guess what works for Ace doesn’t always work for me. Sorry, Koala, i’ll come up with a better way to confess— Hmmph!”

 

Maybe, even though half of the day was gone and she no longer felt lightheaded, some of last night’s alcohol was still coursing through her after all. That would explain the burst of bravery, when her hand shot out and reached for Sabo’s collar, holding tight as she pulled him down for a deep kiss.

 

And then slap him so hard, the blonde flew and crashed against the priest podium, breaking them into splinters.

 

“Contemplate and repent, you piece of shit,” the blonde spat as she turned around, large bouquet of flowers she had picked up held in hand, “I’m going back to the party, don’t talk to me until you figure out what you’ve done,” and with that, she turned around and stomped away.

 

Hidden behind the flower stems, Sabo’s flower ring was held tightly in her hand, cradled carefully as not to crush it. She smiled softly at the sight of it, and slipped the ring around her ring finger.

 

It fits perfectly.

 

“K-koala, wait! What’s that kiss all about?! Does that mean you feel the same?! Koala! Heeey! Koala!”

**Author's Note:**

> Well, back to assignments i suppose... Tell me what you think?
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading and i hope you enjoy!


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